


Mistaken Identity

by xanzpet (gleefulmusings)



Series: Facets [11]
Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe, Awkward Sexual Situations, Comedy, Gen, M/M, Mild Language, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-02
Updated: 2013-04-02
Packaged: 2017-12-07 05:59:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/745097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gleefulmusings/pseuds/xanzpet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Angel really should learn to ask for names.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mistaken Identity

Buffy couldn’t help but stare at the bruised and battered soldier before her, his blue eyes dimmed, purple shadows gathering beneath them. His shoulders were hunched and his clothes tattered, a butterfly bandage covering what promised to be a severely nasty gash above his right orbit.

She stifled her sigh.

Stupid Angel.  
  
“Anyway,” he finished, “I just thought you should know. I don’t know if the curse is still in play or not, but from what I’ve heard, I thought it best to warn you.”  
  
She pressed her lips into a thin line and took his hand in hers. “Thanks,” she softly said. “I appreciate what you tried to do.”  
  
He shrugged as if it was nothing, but she knew better. She also knew that in under five minutes, the shit was going to hit the fan and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Not that she would have. This wasn’t her fight.  
  
A knock on the dorm room door signaled the beginning of Round Two. She wearily trudged over and threw it open, unsurprised to find Angel glaring down at her.

Buffy rolled her eyes, stepped aside, and issued an invitation. The vampire angrily stalked into the room, looked the soldier up and down, and sneered.   
  
“You couldn’t wait to run back here and hide behind the Slayer’s skirt, could you, boy?”  
  
Buffy’s eyes widened as she stared at Angel. Oh, hell. He didn’t know? “Um, this is Graham. Graham Miller.”  
  
Angel furrowed his brow and frowned. “But I thought your boyfriend’s name was Riley.”  
  
She nodded. “It is.”  
  
“But…”  
  
“Graham’s not _my_ boyfriend.”  
  
“But...he’s here. Oh, hell.” He turned to Graham, his expression a mixture of sorrow, confusion, and embarrassment. “I’m sorry,” he offered. “You must be Willow’s new, uh, friend. I thought you were someone else.”  
  
“Wow. You _have_ been gone a while,” Buffy noted.  
  
Graham raised an eyebrow and coolly regard the vampire. “And that excuses you attacking an unarmed mortal? Because you mistook me for my best friend?”  
  
Angel glowered. “You’re one of those Initiative boys. One of the ones who chipped Spike?”  
  
Graham gave him a pretty smile. “Oh, you mean Seventeen? How is he, by the way? Still off in search of vamp dentures?”  
  
Buffy snickered.  
  
“Last I heard,” Graham continued, “you and Seventeen were on the outs, what with him hiring some guy to shove hot pokers into your gut.”  
  
Angel flinched and set his mouth in a grim line. “Do you have any idea what your _best friend_ did to Faith?”  
  
Buffy was about to explode, but was cut off by Graham. “Before or after she raped him? I think you’re a little confused.”  
  
“You don’t understand.”  
  
“You’re right, and I don’t want to.” He shrugged. “I don’t _need_ to. Your good friend Faith swapped bodies with your ex-girlfriend and then slept with her boyfriend. She essentially raped both of them.”  
  
Buffy swallowed heavily and averted her eyes, feeling Angel’s inscrutable gaze upon her.  
  
“And let’s not forget how poor misunderstood Faith took Buffy’s mother hostage.” Graham’s eyes narrowed. “See, I like Joyce. She’s a nice lady who’s been real good to me.”  
  
Angel grunted. “I’m sorry for our earlier…exchange, but it looks like the worst has been taken care of.”  
  
“My boyfriend is accustomed to patch jobs.”  
  
“Your…what? Boyfriend?”  
  
The door to the room burst open and Xander strolled in. “That would be me. How’s it hanging, Deadboy?”  
  
Angel took a step back. “Aw, shit.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
“Deadboy, you’ve really fucked up here. You want to help Faith? Hey, whatever. She’s not our problem anymore, so you’re welcome to her, but you have the balls to show up here after kicking Buffy out of, and I quote, ‘your town’ and attack my boyfriend?” He shook his head. “That’s just not cool.”

He quickly pumped the plastic purple bazooka in his hand, pointed it at Angel, and began firing. “Holy water. Dance, Deadboy!”  
  
Angel yelped and began hopping about the room, trying to dodge the spray following him.  
  
“Points for athletic ability, but your complete lack of rhythm is kinda disappointing.”  
  
“That’s enough, baby,” Graham scolded.   
  
Xander was incredulous. “The hell it is! He _hurt_ you!”  
  
“But you kissed it and made it all better, remember?”  
  
The boy flushed and his eyes became bright. “Yeah,” he mumbled, ducking his head. After a moment, he looked back to Angel, his eyes now hard. “Get out and don’t come back, or next time I’ll point this at your face. Or more vulnerable areas.”  
  
“Wow, Xan,” Buffy sighed wistfully, “I’m kinda surprised you’re letting him off this easily.”  
  
His answering grin delighted her and terrified Angel. “Oh, I’m not,” the boy chirped. “See, on the way here, I called Cordy and filled her in.” He turned to the vampire. “She’s waiting for you at your apartment.”  
  
“Fuck,” Angel hissed, squeezing shut his eyes.  
  
The Slayer gave Xander a thoughtful, appraising look. “You’re evil,” she said with approval.  
  
He beamed.  
  
“Do give Cordelia our best, won’t you, Angel?” Graham added. “And tell her thanks for those thoughtful…implements. They’ve come in handy.”  
  
“Implements?” repeated a very interested Buffy.  
  
“Nothing!” Xander shouted. “Uh, looks like you got things here covered, Buff, so Gray and I will just be on our way.” He began backing up. “Not good to see you again, Deadboy,” he saluted Angel. “Say hi to Wes for me. Oh, that’s right. I don’t like him. Still, manners and all. Hope his fingers heal soon.”  
  
“Where are you going?” Buffy demanded, hands on her hips, her shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter.  
  
“Um, Gray’s got early duty in the morning,” he squeaked.  
  
“Xander. It’s eight o’clock.”  
  
“Right! Well,” he paused, searching for an answer as he began edging toward the door, “there are some things we need to take care of before then.”  
  
She snorted. “I bet.”  
  
“We’re gonna go back to my dorm and have massive amounts of hot, sweaty man sex,” stated a stoic Graham.  
  
Angel blinked.  
  
“See?” Buffy asked her best friend. “All I needed was an explanation.”  
  
Xander darted over the threshold.   
  
“Hey! Come back!” she screeched. “I haven’t finished giving you a hard time yet!”  
  
Graham cackled. “Gotta go. A boyfriend’s work is never done.”  
  
“Take pictures!” the Slayer called out after him. After the door clicked shut, she whirled around to face Angel. “You got off lucky.”  
  
He stared at her.  
  
“Cordy called Xan and told him you were heading down here. He figured you and Riley might run into each other, so he kept Riley distracted and sent Graham for a little recon.”  
  
“Your boyfriend needs protection?”  
  
“Keep flapping your thin lips at me, and _you’re_ going to need more than you ever dreamed.” She sighed and waved her hands. “I’m taking a page out of Xander’s book for this one. You want to help Faith? That’s on you. You keep her away from me and mine, and we won’t have a problem.”  
  
He paused, trying for the right words. “What Graham said, about what Faith did to you…”  
  
Her face darkened. “That’s not your business. That’s between Riley and me.”  
  
He gave a sheepish nod. Hadn’t he told Buffy, rather harshly, that what happened in his life wasn’t any concern of hers? Hypocrisy didn’t sit well with him. “Is Joyce okay?”  
  
“Aside from the bruises and being terrified to be alone in own home? She’s fine. Mom’s strong. Giles and Will are with her. I'm just here for clothes; I'm heading back soon.”  
  
“I know you won’t believe this, but Faith is sorry.”  
  
“You’re right. I don’t believe it.”  
  
He shuffled his feet. “I didn’t know Cordelia was still in contact with Xander.”  
  
Buffy shrugged. “That’s between them. Xan and I have learned to stay out of each other’s lives where that stuff’s concerned.”  
  
Angel raised a skeptical brow.  
  
“Xander and Riley are good friends, and he respects my choices. I respect his. Gray has been very good for him. I haven’t seen him this happy since he was with Cordy in junior year.”  
  
“Would you have stopped him if he had aimed that thing at my face?”  
  
She considered her answer. “Eventually.” She pointed to the door. “I think it’s time for you to go.”  
  
He sighed and turned to leave.  
  
“Tell Cordy I said hi.” She grinned as his shoulders stiffened, but said nothing and exited the room.  
  
She sighed and wiped at her eyes, refusing to cry and determined not to be sucked back into the melancholy which resurfaced whenever they came into contact. Smiling evilly to herself, she withdrew her cell from her pocket and dialed Xander’s number.

“Hey. Yeah, he’s gone. Now, about those pictures…”


End file.
